Dude Said, "Black Girls Are Easy"

Warning: this note contains graphic material as it is in response to another post.
This blog is my perspective on another blog and mentality I ran across :http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fblackgirlsareeasy.blogspot.com%2F2011%2F03%2Fare-you-wifey-or-are-you-pussy.html%3Fspref%3Dfb&h=38cc2
Now my first problem with this post is, this black man singled out BLACK women for being easy not just women, or some women of every race/culture or creed..... but Black women. *Blank Stare* Then it's the down grading of sisters under the guise that he is in fact trying to uplift and educate them about the way BLACK MEN DOWN PLAY BLACK women. I've seen "easy and gullable women with poor self worth in all colors and flavors, secondly, I KNOW women in all colors who are everything HE claims is an ideal wifey but only wanna be "pussy" to a brother like him, cuz he's not hubby material to HER. You see, everybody is just "dick or pussy" to somebody and nobody wants to just be "dick or pussy' all the time to anybody. Nobody can determine but each and every individual somebody who will wife who and who wouldn't. The responses to his article is proof of that. It's just like the same brother can be a dog to one woman and a complete gentleman and treating another like a Queen, the same woman can act like she's just pussy to one man and be all down with another man . I quote him on,"Are you the type he wifes or are you just "pussy?" See this is a doubled edged sword my brothers, you can only get away with this self sufficient, self educated bullshit with a certain type of woman too .



Now don't get me wrong, I agree we set the stage for how we are treated and that we have half the responsibility on the outcome based on the income(Brains, worth and experience intuitively to know the signs that ur time is being wasted if u think a brother is goin to invest in u seriously). Now dude is saying if a sister is boring and unintelligible, can't hold a decent conversation cuz she's doesn't know shit and just not an interesting person, she is just ass and she has no other purpose but to get a man off. He just going to do drive bys, he's not gonna spend any quality time with her. Then dude goes further to remind us these are not just "hoes" he's speaking of but "girlfriends" status. Women they might even have children with and will be seen in public with but their families and loved ones don't know this woman cuz she's just "pussy". I ask you then, what REAL benefits does "wifey" have on pussy? 99% of the time, he don't even want wifey's pussy but definitely has some pussy on the side. Trust when I tell you, a brother that agrees with this mentality is keeping and constantly looking for any other pussy in addition to wifey's. It's the whole reason he needs to classify women into the two compartments cuz he needs to justify his greed, selfishness and egotistical bullshit. It don't have a damn thing to do with her being , smart enough, interesting enough to keep his mind stimulated cuz even then he will still try to LABEL her "pussy" if that's all he WANTS her to be to HIM.





Wifey who agrees with this menatlity or women who feel they're wifey material and bout to get wifed, believing the hype that even if her man keeps pussy on the side she is somehow above this woman. HOW?! Bcuz he comes home to you every night? Bcuz U wear his ring and his last name? Bcuz he's with u and the kids on Sunday? Cuz he keeps food on the table and the bills paid? First of all, he's not being faithful to YOU, he's dishonoring his vows to you. Gives u some spending Money? Pussy is with him more,he more than likely spending money with and on her too unless she got a man too and he's just her play thing as well. Then some of you dudes swear up and down a woman is just pussy to you but u worry about who else she spending time with when it's ur wife u should be watching.U will go home and cuss your wife out cuz pussy is under your skin and got you fucked up and give wifey some "rude boy" cuz pussy is on ur mind. U can't wait to see pussy, even if you aint met pussy yet,LOL. The mission itself is what ur in love with cuz it's NOT wifey and it's for this very reason a lot of women don't want you for anything but dick and pities wifey. She can have everything wifey can have and not be tied to your ass legally. She can walk away just like u can. Then wifey walks too, when she realizes there is no real value in being your wife. U love her? really? That's why U have pussy in waiting, cuz even though wifey don't have to have bomb pussy she smart and so interesting that is all you need to keep yo ass home and be happy and faithful.



That's some bullshit too, That's why Shaq left his wife of many years and kids for Hoops "pussy" ass?! Pussy don't matter itself? LOL,okay, this is where I say men proudly marry pussy all the time. Some women are still single cuz they waiting on a man to tell them he in love with their brains and NOT their pussy or both. be careful fellas , cuz most of the time you play yourselves trying to play these women. All you're really doing is labeling her so u don't have to feel guilty for how you use her, but sooner or later and the longer u use her u gonnna feel her and that's when she gon leave you for good. learn to be content even if you can't satisfy ur insatiable inner hoe that you have a woman with brains and personality, a heart, loyalty and good pussy or you could end up with nothing but pussy and life is just booty for you. The bottom line is... wifey or not, if u play with pussy you get fucked(in more than one way)!!!



Final thought:

Ladies? A man in your life that truly cares about U(or want u to think he does for whatever reason) will tell you you have the power, ur pussy. You have to know when to give it and when to take it. If u give it even after a certain time frame has passed and he was good til he got it then started acting a fool on you. that's not your fault he was gonna do that anyway cuz he never lost sight of the goal, to hit it and quit it. Just take ur shit back , learn from it n move on. Don't let him keep hittin it when it's CLEAR he don't want YOU. Everything is a gamble, who's to say he won't do abstinence with YOU a whole year(cuz he gettin it somewhere else) and still lose interest once he hit? he can know from the jump ur wifey material and still not wife u cuz he just wants the pussy on U. U CAN NOT CHANGE HIS MIND or heart,but you can change yours.

ong>

The Catch and Release Syndrome

You ever watch men fish? The way they can wait quietly and patiently for hours for a bite? I've watched my Dad fish and the excitement on his face when he caught a big one is indescribable. Of course he'd have to take it home to show his boys saying stuff like " Would you look at this pretty motherfucker?!"Then he'd freeze it or scale it and fry it right away. Then there were times when they went together and they'd all catch one and admire it a few seconds and throw it back in. Thus is the same way subconciously or not (according to the comic here) they approach the pursuit of women. The chase and wait is more thrilling than the catch. Sometimes they need others to see what they've accomplished and sometimes nobody ever need know but them. During those catch and release sessions, I realized they even had compassion for their captive to set it free. Almost in a sense that they appreciated it's right to be free n happy and not feeling worthy or guilty. Rarely will a man do that with a woman though without taking something from her that she values first. I say we don't bite the bait, that we make them sweat and struggle to catch us, so that they will consume us with some pride and dignity and let us have ours too. "Nothing ventured , nothing gained" is the equivalent to "You don't appreciate a thing you didn't work hard for like a thing you did."

Criticizing True Parenting and Leadership

http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/local/breakingnews/os-school-bus-dad-girl-released-20100923,0,4512697.story

So the link of above is that regarding a young lady with cerebral palsy who had been bullied by student on a Seminole County school bus. Before I get into my observations and perspective on this, I want to first say God Bless the family and welcome the girl home from the hospital in hopes that she will not be forever scarred by her ordeal and the fact that her father was punished for a heroic and fatherly act.

I posted an article awhile ago,about bullies and teasing and when it goes too far. I've read a lot of articles revolving around this particular story, that has caused many adults to relive their childhood nightmares of being bullied by mean kids. These kids are not just mean, they aren't properly reared and parented. Although a lot of bullies are also victims unbeknownst to us, it only and often epidemically spreads this tragic condition in life rather than impedes it.

James Jones is the father of this young girl who just started middle school and happens to be handicapped. His daughter was being bullied on the school bus to the subjection of having a condom unwrapped and placed on her head. How vulgar and disrespectful is that?! Mr. Jones reported that he had in fact spoke to school officials about what was happening to his child. They didn't do anything! He took matters into his own hands by boarding the bus to confront the students, cursing at them and threatening the boy who placed a condom on his daughter's head. He was arrested and his daughter continued to be bullied. The fact that authorities disciplined the man instead of the students proves why it continued. Why they didn't learn anything from their actions and the consequences therein. There weren't any consequences for them!

We as a society criticize parents and their ability to lead and supervise delinquent minded children with tough love (okay it wasn't tough love but anger but necessary and valid) when it's necessary. Yet officials show no competence in their ability to prevent such incidents from occurring. They encourage us to participate in our child's schools, to help lead the children, they often accuse parents of using them as babysitters and not being involved and invested in their children educational and learning environment. Contradictory and hypocrisy at it's best! I myself have had to deal with similar situations being a mother of three. When my son was in fifth grade, he was dragged in the girl's bathroom by four young ladies. When a teacher saw him exiting, she jumped to the conclusion that my son RAPED the girls?! WTF???!!! It went on his record where he was told it would be a permanent crime on his record for life. The girls did not hesitate to confess that they PULLED my son in the bathroom because they thought he was cute,(which would could have very well been classified as sexual harassment from such harsh judgment as the one exercised against my son) they were ignored. My son was heartbroken as was I. I was more furious which led me to fight for my son and I mean by any means necessary and literally if push came to shove. The next morning I was stopped at the school entrance and told the charges were removed. You think that satisfied me? Hell no, they were gonna hear from me still. They were gonna know that it was not acceptable to drag my son's good name through the dirt like that and not even for a split second! They thought because they decided to do the right thing however late it was okay to call my son a rapist and not even apologize to him. Sometimes the children involved will have a conscious and remorse for their actions and it's the PARENTS AND OFFICIALS who don't.The only apology we received was from the young ladies involved. "It's over, we have taken care of it", is all the staff had to say. So I said "Fuck you very much!" and thanked the girls, who deserved recognition for taking responsibility for their actions .

Fifteen years later, I'm experiencing the same with my nephew. Who has
reported to me on more than one occasion that his teachers observe him being attacked and threatened and do nothing until he feels forced to defend himself. They then only acknowledge him as the wrong doer and reprimand him. I will hear the teacher out and if she so much as stutters I serve her ass up on a platter. I would much rather deal with an adult than a child. Which brings me to my point. These "mofos"(officials) don't want to deal with the parents because they figure if the child is that unruly and out of control the parents are ten times worst and they are scared. They'd rather take a chance on YOU and your decent character and well behaved child because you will be easier to deal with right? WRONG!! Make no mistake that good character and manners makes me a punk and that I won't get "loco" to protect my children and their rights! Go Mr. Jones, they ought to be kissing your black ass, giving you the key to the damn city and asking you to jump on board that damn bus as security!

Show Me a Happy Atheist and I'll Show You At Least Twenty Miserable Ones

Woke up with this for some reason, it was like a message in a dream, that said, "Show me a happy Atheist and I'll show u 20 miserable ones". Let it be known here that I don't have a personal dislike for Atheist, Scientology or any other religion, non-religion on the face of the earth. Well Jehovah Witnesses maybe, not because of their belief but because of their "over- bearing/ gotta shove this down your throat attitudes". I have been associates with all kinds and enjoy different perspectives and views, however, I never let it affect my belief. I rarely even allow myself to get into debates with opposing faiths/religions but, Atheist was something I had to understand and learn about. I wanted to know how & why they came to not believe in God. Most of these people once upon a time had a religion, they weren't born into Atheism or raised on it.

Fascinated I was on their many philosophies and dare I say, even facts. So they can make a lot of sense why religion as they call it, is bullshit. Going back to Christianity's violent roots, a religion based on love and forgiveness. That the bible has been written many times over at the hands of man.I've drawn a conclusion that thought the truth sets you free, facts can't make u miserable. They get no argument from me on these points but to say God doesn't exist? In all your facts you have no peace with self or life, whereas I have peace with both and it's due to my faith in God. If it's been proven that God doesn't exist through science and that the universe is responsible for aligning things in my favor then it doesn't explain the spiritual connection I have with an omnipresence I call God that is ever present in my life. So my faith is based on what I can't see but know exists while the Atheist does not believe anything he cannot see or trust anything he cannot see.

I asked for proof there is no God, they asked for proof there was. I said he's right here(pointing at heart) I can feel him. They say, "I can't see him, You being a good person is your own doing and choice. I don't give God credit for that" So U don't have to believe in God to be a good person, but how can you be a good person when you're miserable? And why are you miserable? Why do you have heart and other health problems(not saying believers don't but not constantly being attacked to the death of them either)vengeance, grudges, thick hatred for at least three people since you were a kid and just a doubtful cynic full of gloom? And dig this, they blame God for all the problems in their life health issues, loss of love ones, bad luck and so forth, but he doesn't even exist? Yet any good that befalls on them is from that of the universe. How can this be? How can you hate so much and say just because you don't believe in God you're still a good person? God aside,where is your PEACE? Why has the universe failed you on just having peace in your life? Did you not stare at the stars long enough, or acknowledge that scent that rain was coming last week?

One Atheist in particular that I have really enjoyed is George Carlin. I have no shame that Carlin has entertained, intrigued and caused me to think with his work("It's Bad For Ya",You Are All Diseased","Brain Droppings") of philosophies/facts on religion and rather God exists. I'd go so far to say even Jesus has chuckled with the man. Carlin suffered three heart attacks prior to his death, Outside the black humor he shares with his fellow Atheists I didn't see happy man. A man at peace with his life or what he believed even though he seemed content with it he wasn't at peace with it. Neither are the others I know. I am a spiritual person, not a religious person. Religion confuses me and contradicts itself. God does neither, I don't have the answers for why God allows death, takes people away from us, allows bad things to happen to us. I do not understand it.... but I accept it. Accepting that u don't understand and don't need to can make all the difference in rather you are blessed or cursed, happy or miserable in life.
So please, for the sake of argument show me One happy Atheist. Will you please step forward? The one that doesn't have a bad heart, still hating his father for walking out when he was a kid, walks around with a dark cloud over his head even though people find your black humor entertaining, your laughter isn't even the source of joy. By the way, I found this site, it's called Happy Atheist Forum, when I read the site I didn't think the person was happy. I saw ignorant bliss:http://www.happyatheistforum.com/viewtopic.php?t=791

Advocates or Antagonists?

Being
blessed with perception and cursed with analyzing shit to death, I
couldn't help but notice how on point some of my observations and
analysis are. Is it just me (God forbid), or does anyone else seem to
be seeing how those who represent and favor a certain cause, thing or
person(s) seem to lose focus on that which they are standing up for?
Seem to be losing their fucking minds in the process of? Is the thing
that drives you the very thing that will drive your ass crazy? Do you
think you're so slick in your game/motive to entertain that you forget
who you are and what you were doing in the first place?! Is the real
enemy out to get you so tough that he frames you and put the weapon of
destruction in your hand while you sleep to make you look like you
can't be trusted? Make you look like a fake... or are you really a
fake?


Isn't that like saying, "Say no to drugs" and smoking crack your
damn self?! Like Saying "Big is beautiful" and then starve yourself
skinny (Mo'Nique)? "Thou shall not commit adultery and fornication" and
get caught in the whore house with a dick up your ass and yours in
somebody's mouth(various preachers and senators)? "I love sister and
respect them, they deserve better", then go out and fuck over and
betray good intentioned females? I'm under oath to preserve life" and
let a man die cuz he has no insurance?
I've seen a lot of "die hard" advocates self destruct and worst than
that, let many people down and disappoint them. That's why we need to
have enough hope and faith within ourselves cuz most of your motivation
and edification is coming from a false source wisdom, preciseness and
experience. Stop letting waka flockas (motherfuckers) blow smoke up
your ass! I read a scripture in the bible where a man says God told him
to "Wait and see, watch and learn"! You better say that! Advocacy is
usually false advertising at it's best practiced in the most vital and
fragile aspects of humanity.


The good news is, they usually fuck
themselves harder than they fucked you! I got to thinking hard on this
when I heard some of the responses to Mo'Nique's Golden Globe speech.
Now even though it was a beautiful speech, she lost the devotion and
ability to hear from her followers. WHY?!!! She CHANGED on their asses!
So they didn't HEAR her speech they only SAW this heifer getting
skinnier and skinnier before their eyes that USE to rep Big sisters!
The only one's who heard her speak were the ones who didn't buy that
"I'm happy the way I am" speech she was selling before. If it's so
beautiful and you love yourself in that body, why are you running from
it? More importantly, what's running you AWAY from that which you had
such strong convictions about? Every body selling something but what do
you buy and why? Most people are selling it not because they believe in
it or actually use or practice it but because they can benefit from it
and you believing the hype. Practice what you preach!


Yeah I know
nothing is guaranteed, that's why I put all my faith in me , God and
what Dee knows! I'm a woman of my word, keeper of my own damn thoughts,
beliefs and convictions. I know I wouldn't be selling nobody out more
than I'd be selling myself out. Stand up for yourself and what you
believe in, don't waiver for another flavor cuz somebody that looked up
to you and had respect for you will be disgusted with you. No not them
, the image you see staring back at you in the mirror!
SMH it never fails, they will slip up and show you who they really are
every time. I can't say it enough... keep it real!

The Good Son:Evil Has Many Faces

Damn, that's all I could say when a relative still living in Highland Park where I grew up called me and told me to click on the news. I mean it's sad enough that the man killed his own son, haven't seen anything this horrific since the late Marvin Gaye was taking from us at the hands of his own father. That was less horrific for the fact Marvin was a full grown man said to be attacking his elderly father, but still ya know?! *sighs* But this?! According to the Aunt, dude had already fucked his son up for whatever he had done/said. She said he had knots all over his head like those Tommy Hearns gave Martin( Martin Lawrence). To escort the boy out in public naked,( he must have really lost it) to kill him in a field execution style?! This is his son and let's say the rumor(son was caught raping 3 year old sister) is true.... THAT is his little girl. A little girl who assumes her big brother will protect her and her father surely can. A father that is torn between protecting his baby girl against evil that happens to be his son. Remember the movie The Good Son? Did ol girl not let her biological son fall to his death in order to save the other child in her care? I'd like to think I would have beat his ass then have him arrested or put away in a mental institution. Hoping some day he would be well and try to help my baby girl get thru her ordeal. I'd like to think that I wouldn't play God in a situation like that. I only pray I never find myself in that position having been raped as a child myself. I'm just saying, people snap and as a result you have horrible mishaps. Clearly there are too many mofos walking around not on medication for their mental illnesses
Link to the story surrounding this post:
http://blog.al.com/spotnews/2009/11/post_222.html

Teasing Toughens? Is it ever constructive

So I've been thinking about what it means to be teased or being the teaser and rather it is ever harmless or helpful. Upon discussing this with a friend, I came to the conclusion that where teasing has hurt some, even destroyed.... it has helped me. I was teased most of my childhood, at home and at school. I was called everything, you name it from Lurch to flea bag, spooks,bucked tooth, blackie, ugly and many, many more.Don't get me wrong, at the time and during my early years it was torture and pure hell but the older I got the tougher I got without becoming like my offenders. I found myself becoming the hero and activist for bullied and teased kids in the hood. I also noticed with my growing confidence, that I could laugh with my teasers. This of course didn't happen til I was a teenager flunking my first semester of high school. I remember my Uncle Earl teasing me and calling me a dummy and telling me what each F(funky, foolish, feeble,etc.) stood for on my report card. At first I was laughing and then I started to realize that he might really believe I was a dummy. The thing is I knew I just didn't like going to school with kids I had nothing in common with. I guess part of me was avoiding conflict too. My Uncle also knew and was using a method I wasn't familiar with.... reverse psychology. He wasn't teasing me to hurt me , he was pushing the buttons that would make me fight back and prove him wrong. I turned all those F's into A's after that and he would tell me, "I knew you could do it". Now, there are kids that don't get it, who never come out fighting(mentally that is) when their backs are up against a wall. They end up forever scarred and crippled by bullies and teasers. Some even commit suicide. Some grow up and abuse their children and spouses.


There are also different types of teasing just are there are different personality types. So one can't be too careful when it comes to teasing individuals. With children teasing comes naturally but not consciously. Other than the fact they can sense when someone is shy, nervous or unsure of themselves, they really don't know what they're doing or why. With adults, it's usually them who have the inferiority complex and are trying to feel superior over their victims and their audience.When I tease I try to do it with love and consideration, it is never with malicious intent. I try to make a person realize there is a stronger person within and aim to bring him forth. That's why I have a philosophy that if you can laugh at yourself the world will laugh with you, but if you cry for yourself the world will still laugh at you. So why not laugh at yourself first? Then people will find the next best thing to do, respect you. I hate to see that so many people are destroyed and deeply affected by teasing so many years ago today. That they never got over it, never used it to find out who they were and what they needed to get to the next level in life.


It's a miserable place to be... the victim. Because it saids about you that your oppressor won even though he/she hated him/herself more than he hated you. That they have brought you into their realm of misery and despair for all eternity , be it in life or death. Remember, it's an even more miserable place to be the bully/teaser because they need something to feed off of. If you don't bite the bait, the fisherman doesn't eat that night ;)

Black Widows and the Need to Feed the Greed

Deidra Lane was a chilling story of an NFL wife who was born with a silver spoon in her mouth but robbed banks and murdered her husband, for a 5 million dollar insurance policy. I guess you could say she was going for platinum? I tried wrapping my mind around this one as I read of her release from being imprisoned for 8 years earlier this year. I guess you could say I'm a bit worried being the mother of children with star quality. What kind of people are out here preying on our son's and daughters? What's driving them to do these things when they seem to already have money? I mean this girl's dad paid a $100,000 bond to get her out of jail knowing she would be convicted. That's having money to throw around if you ask me. Was she just that rotten and spoiled that she had a bottomless pit in her soul that couldn't be satisfied? I mean it was found out that dude was broke and ready to leave her. Fred Lane Jr. returned that day to retrieve a motor cycle in order to sell it for cash. While she had been splurging and spending she was also robbing banks with the help of her best friend. Not to mention how easy on the eyes she is, was said to be soft spoken and kind. Friends and parents were totally blind sided by the fact that she didn't appear to be a gold digger because her parents were wealthy. See, I think it's very important to teach our children to value people more than they do material things like money and all it can afford them. Somewhere along the line money becomes their God, parents , best friends and spouses and the actual human form gets in their way to keep it and have more of it. There is really no other logical explanation for this woman going to extremes as to commit murder for something she has never been deprived of... wealth. No morals or compassion for life, only dollars. It wouldn't surprise me if her own father ended up dead now. She has a need to feed her greed that HE instilled in her. This young man is gone now, will never meet his daughter who was only 7 days old when her mother murdered him. The court had the nerve to give the orphaned child to his murderers parents?! MONEY TALKS and it don't have to be bullshit to walk! Now she is out 8 years later and back home to raise her daughter who will probably have the same materialistic disease she has. The least justice could have done is give the child to her father's family. Deidra Lane has not fed off humanity enough for the law and respect for human life to take her problem seriously yet. The Black Widow will attack again.

Get Away Cars: Toyota

*singing theme from an old Toyota commercial* "You asked for it, you got it Toyota!" Okay, what the hell is going on here? Are the makers of Toyota cars conspiring to kills us? Is this another terrorist act? No I'm joking, but not really because this is serious. These cars decide to accelerate without warning and against the drivers navigation at up 100 mph. We're talking up to 2000 cases being reported to date! So I ask you people, if you buy a Toyota are you asking for it? Are you planning some kind of get away that could result in a "Thelma and Louise flying off a cliff" kind of death? Are you suicidal? Are you a daredevil? These are just some of the reasons to buy a Toyota in an economy that's already killing us.

Family Dysfunctions

This is a hard one to swallow, it's like opening Pandora's Box. I noticed a lot families that consider themselves socialites or high society so to speak, don't like to admit that they have issues. If you were born in such a family you either had 1 of 2 choices, rebel or follow suit. You either got to wear the snobbish robe or be the asshole or jerk everyone wants to sabotage by saying you're nuts and influence others against. To keep the family secrets on lock down, some harsh things are done and said at the expense of this so called asshole or jerk. Let's just call this person a heckler in reverse. You see, even though they seem to rock the boat, they're actually trying to fix the broke down motherfucker.There's so much dust on top of issues that's been swept under rugs, even termites can't chew through them and breathe at the same time. The sad thing is, they think everything is running smoothly and long as you keep your mouth shut. When the truth is the whole damn family is headed towards the likes of a titanic tragedy due to improper navigation at the hands of a captain and crew(head of the family and elders) who cannot admit wrong doing and will throw your ass to the sharks before they do. I say let them throw you off and save yourself. For it is better to be eaten alive by sharks than your own people.

So here I am today wondering how old and bad habits survive generation after generation and no one dares to break the cycle of such destructive, traditional, ill fated pride and behavior. I'm wondering how those that follow and occasionally speak against things , which is acknowledging their awareness, continue to fall back in with fear they call respect rather than have the courage to set a better example by showing them a better or even right way? Even if the right way doesn't feel as pretty, earn you favor points it should certainly feel good to YOU. It should certainly earn you some respect. So knowing I will never fully understand the ways of a coward, I also will always prefer to be the heckler than the follower. I will always choose the truth over the illusion which destines us to delusion. Skeletons in the closet rattling in the descendants rooms years down the line keep them disturbed and in utter confusion about who they are and what they represent.Let those issues out the box and deal with them before they blow up in your faces. Let's not go to our graves knowing we've left our people in bondage!

He Wore a raspberry Beret

Disclaimer: This is not a current story, in fact I did this one a couple of years ago on 360. However I have new thoughts about the situation having viewed this movie above called Tim and Mary (a Hallmark film that will air again today)and the person recently trying to re connect with me.

I could not help but snicker when the music and lyrics to Prince's Raspberry Beret popped in my head while watching this movie and seeing the similarities to the girl in the song AND this guy I attempted to date. So I'm asking my friends have they ever considered dating a slow person? I have, before you laugh or look at me sideways first consider this, we are all flawed. Even though they are mentally/intellectually challenged, they are very gifted beyond average ability in other ways. Guys, I know it isn't that hard for you to date or just screw a slow girl. In fact it makes things easier for a commitment phobic guy or gal. They never press or complain. They can be very practical people and they have big hearts. The things that irks me is that they are children trapped in an adults body and if you have kids you don't want to date one. You don't want to have to constantly explain shit to them(especially the same things) and answer silly questions. It isn't always that obvious either that you are dealing with a slow person right away. You might just be blind sided by their charm, good looks and the good nature they exude. You know like the song says, "She walked in through the outdoor". You might even notice something unusual and find it appealing and intriguing. Then one day you'll learn they can't read beyond four letter words or comprehend what they are reading. That they can't add 3 and 4 digit problems. That they can't even follow simple instructions without getting confused and upset. Again, like the song saids, "She wasn't too bright I could tell, but when she kissed me she knew how to get her kicks". Now please tell me how they know how to put it down so well as lovers ?! I mean they know the ins and outs, the ABC's and the damn chemistry and algebra of making love but can't read the sign on a door? Ok, so here's the thing about this dude, he is very nice and kind. He's the best lover I ever had hands down! He's generous and very helpful and can do a lot of things around a house. Frankly, I care a bout the guy, so much I set him free. There is just no way in hell or heaven I can be in a serious relationship with this guy. It really hurt me to hurt his feelings like that but I couldn't do it. Shit you think I wanted to give up that sex?! Hell to the no! I just don't want to have to be his mama and his woman. We have that problem with men who are not slow, but think we are *blank stare* They think they got us sprung so bad we will take care of them and be their woman and their mama*scoffs*. At least the slow man is responsible, knows his role as a man even if he don't necessarily have a big brain. Most of them do have jobs. I digress, I cannot stress myself out like that. I mean can you see that shit? All day you saying "No no no baby" and all night you saying "Yes, yes yes!" SMH, it's a damn shame. In this Movie, Mary is a Attracted to a gentle and kind Tim. She knows he is slow, but she also acknowledges there is something very special about him. She fights it at first and then ends up agreeing to marry the man. His father had asked her to be Tim's guardian in the event he should die. Even the father didn't think Mary should be in a intimate relationship with his son. Maybe the fact that Mary didn't have any children and was a widow made the difference in her tolerance for the situation. Here's a woman that spent 20 something years with one man and then many more after he passed way alone. It took this special person to bring her desires back out. She has the time and the patience to love this man with special needs. I saw a woman yesterday on my way home from the Children's Center to claim my Foster parent license. Standing at the bus stop with five children. The older boy especially was out of control, but she and all of her children appeared to be slow. The boy was just bad and disrepectful while the others just seemed to be on some Helen Keller shit. She could not control any of them especially him. She seemed confused as rather to be their mother or their friend. She was like, "stop that!", then laughing at them. I found myself looking up and praying , "Lord, don't let slow/mentally challenged people have babies." I mean that too, and although I like to think two mentally challenged people can end up giving birth to a genius. It is more likely that some selfish person with an inferior complex is taking advantage of these people and then leaving them to care for kids they cannot fathom to do so on their own. If you're gonna take one on , make the commitment to them and take care of them and protect them from the world and it's cruelty, because they are like the children in that sense. Helpless and alone. If Mary and Tim have a child, she is there to help him be a good father in ways he may fall short. I'm sure THEY won't have children though. So this special guy calls me last week and saids , "I was just thinking about you and would like to see you" and I said "Well honey it was nice to hear from you and I wish you nothing but the best. I just feel you and I are better off not seeing each other. I will always have kind thoughts of you and pray for you and your happiness".(BTW, I tell him this at least every 6 months to a year for the last 3 years now). He said "ok", but you can be sure he will return again with the same sentiments , it never fails. he saids he likes the fact that I am patient and compassionate with him even though he frustrates me. yes he is aware he irritates me at times. He tries really hard to be batter for my sake, but the fact is he is who he is and he is who he will always be take it or leave it. Maybe some day he will really be gone and found happiness, and I will smile because that is truly what I wish for him.

I watched the Black List this morning on HBO, and the commentary that stood out the most to me was that of Keenan Ivory Wayans'. " I dropped out of my 3rd year of college at Tuskegee studying for a degree in engineering to become a comedian. My father told me, Son you should finish college to ensure you have something to fall back on. I thought to myself, I don't want to fail so NOT having anything to fall back on will ensure that I don't fail." Now I realize why our children don't seem to understand the importance of degrees. We're not trying to instill fear of failure in you. We're trying to instill the power of having options for more than one way to succeed in you. I totally get Mr. Wayans' analogy, but I feel when things ran it's course in his career as a comedian he could have better engineered himself in the industry much further. He has successfully opened doors for many others including younger siblings.He launched the Careers of Jim Carey and Jamie Foxx who have had far more success than he has. Mr. Wayans has my respect. I know he is a bright and gifted man and he has achieved more than I probably ever will. On that note, in the words of the LATE Richard Pryor, "I aint dead yet motherfuckers". Clearly this is the mind set of many young people who have great gifts and talents that doesn't necessarily require degrees. So many of our youth feel they don't have to go to college because they have a gift that is their ticket to success in life. I agree they do have these gifts and I believe in these gifts. I do not however, believe God grants gifts without consequence for lack of knowledge and understanding. I believe the gifts and the knowlegde are a package that guarantee you always find a way out , around and above any obstacles that may arise. It is because Mr.Wayans is so gifted and bright that he is still able to succeed "behind the scenes" through his siblings and others despite not having finished his degree. When I look at Stars like Sean P.Diddy Combs and Russell Simmons, even Ice Cube (who later went back and got his degrees.. it's never too late) who realized that even with all their success, degrees mattered. I encouraged my children to get all they can out of life and education. Just getting through everyday life requires knowledge and understanding. The world will eat you alive if you're not equipped to survive in it. Although I may not have all the equipment I need, I have some of the tools(knowledge and understanding) to get to work on this project called my life. Like anything a man sets out to work on, he can start with a hammer and a nail and keep buying the rest as he goes to build a better and stronger product. So it is with education, keep adding to yourself and what you already know and can do. EXPAND, GROW and BUILD. We've come a long way, but yet we have a long way to go and it starts with knowledge. Let's not trip out with the feeling we need a governance to patent our worth by having degrees. So many excuse themselves by saying, " Hell I don't have to read some idiots books to tell me how I can and should do something I already know how to do and better. Why should I have to start from scratch to get a paper saying I know how to do something I've been doing for years naturally? Why? I'll tell you why we should, because it gives us the opportunity and power to show THEM how We do it better and have them reading OUR books! The truth is NOBODY knows just how powerful you are but you so what's the point? I thought this way for so long without realizing I was cheating myself and missing the opportunities to gain the upper hand. I refuse to allow my children to live in that same ignorant bliss. When my son decided to work and go to college instead of pursuing his music career as a priority, I was proud and mostly because HE made that choice on his own. There is absolutely nothing wrong with having something to fall back on. It's yours to fall back on,, you earned it. It's your ace in the hole. You've given yourself options, options you can use even in the things that you want more than you want them. You'll see that it worked for all the good and favor of YOU.

Jamie, Who/What You Gonna "Blame" THIS on?

Apparently recently Garcelle Beauvais-Nilon appeared on the Wendy William's show as a guest. Ms. Beauvais is a Haitian born model actress who played opposite Foxx in The Jamie Foxx Show. Ms. Beauvais-Nilon leaked/slipped up a shocker that Jamie Foxx has a new baby?! That when Foxx broke the news to her she teased, "Wow Jamie! Do I know the mama?" he goes "No" and she goes "Do YOU know the mama?" LMAO!!!! For Ms. Beauvais-Nilon(I'm so tired of typing that shit), there was no turning back. She then apologized to Mr.Foxx as she realized it was not public knowledge. This chic has to really be out of the loop NOT to know that! *scoffs* As for Wendy who did not know this, she was a happy lil gossiping predator all aglow. My thing is not the gossip aspect of it, but what a smooth cat this brother is! I'm impressed. We all know about his darling Corrinne. Mr. Foxx has been living as a bachelor/player for quite some time now and manages to keep life style drama free and his business HIS business, much like George Clooney did. I dreamed about him for some reason last night,lol. Before that, Mr Foxx was just some silly clown, great actor and gifted singer and entertainer to me, (like Will Smith) who could make me laugh til my sides split but didn't find sexy. Well Claude have mercy they're both sexy as hell to me right now. They have so got grown and sexy on me without losing their sense of humor. Move over Will, this about Jamie though,lol. I do wanna know who his new baby mama is cuz she is one luckay bish *glaring suspiciously*. Last I checked, reps for Foxx had neither denied or confirmed the baby bomb allegations. It's Sunday, I'm chillin and going back to la la land to get me some Jamie. Peeeeeeace!

Pain is Not Vain

If I could go back and change any of the incidents/events in my life that caused me pain and suffering..... I would not. Instead today I celebrate and embrace every last one of them. It's really quite beautiful once you understand the true purpose of pain, trial and tribulation in your life. In fact, I think pain is essential to the "rebirth", growth and development of one's life... evolution. Imagine if you will, the pain of bringing a new life into the world. It's excruciating, overwhelming and frightening. Half way through the experience you began to wonder if it's worth it, if you can change your mind and go back... but you can't. You're at the point of no return, so you continue to push and press on. You figure the sooner it's over the better, and at that point you are hopeful again that you can survive this, because you have a mind to survive and see what the outcome will bring. When that new life has finally arrived, you are so elated with what you have accomplished that the pain and struggle seem a lifetime ago. I believe that God intended you to go through everything you went through, he knows the beginning and the end of every man's story. You are impregnated with God's vision and purpose for your life. There is a design to just what it's gonna take to get you to it and through it... your destiny. It's like getting out of your skin and getting back in it a different person. It's a painful, shocking and a dreaded experience, but it takes a courageous, ambitious and hungry individual to embrace it. Knowing or not knowing, what's on the other side. What's at the end of that cold, dark tunnel is the reason I look forward to the next scrape, bump and bruise. I'll just patch them up and keep moving because I'm determined to complete my mission, which is to find my purpose. To become whole, at peace with myself and others, especially God. If I do not suffer God cannot compensate me for my troubles, then I will not know what God has brought me above and beyond. The OUTCOME tells me what God meant for me, not my adversaries. The INCOME is just what somebody feels you deserve(man). So let's not worry about how someone paid us( or didn't) for our kindness, loyalty and efforts. Only rejoice in knowing God will pay you for the humility you endured

When A Beautiful Mind Goes Wrong

A beautiful mind is a fragile thing, Take care of your mental health like you would your physical health.I always refer to the mind as a light bulb. Giving light to thoughts and ideas but will blow out and shatter if not properly or over used. Kanye tells Leno he is ashamed and apologetic regarding the Taylor Swift incident and that he wants to take time off to self reflect. The first step to getting help is acknowledging you need help. Kudos to Kanye for that one! Which brings me to my point, I often see the talents and gifts of great people lost in utter confusion and imbalance. Brilliance in over drive causing a break down in the nervous and mental areas of our fragile state of being. I can remember telling a friend I could see her light "bulb about to shatter" because she was mentally distraught and her nervous system was shot. That she needed to chill because unlike being able to replace a bulb, we cannot replace our minds and often find ourselves the same as before even with medicine purposefully intending to repair us. I have observed(from afar) strange behavior in brilliant people such as Prince, Tom Cruise, Michael Jackson , R. Kelly and now Kanye West and wondered, "What the hell is going on with them?!". When amazing and unique things flow excessively from one person consistently the way they do these people, they are without a doubt phenomenal. Often times there is a negative imbalance of what to do with and how to relate to the gift(and others). they lose perspective and start to spiral out of control. In the case of John Forbes Nash, whom Russel Crowe betrayed in the film A beautiful Mind, paranoid schizophrenia was evident cause of his downfall and I wonder with the rise of if this illness can it be the case with others. Such is the is the same observation I see in up close and personal relationships around me including myself. There are many facets that come into play here,but in the end taking care of one's mental health is a MUST! Therapy such as counseling, psychiatry (if you dare!)meditation, yoga,spiritual, self reflection, etc. I think it essential to have peace in your life with EVERYTHING that has EVER affected you in your life, to have a happy and healthy mental state of being. When I take a bulb that has blown out and hear and feel the wire loosely dangling inside, thus is how I perceive the mind state of a person(s) who has allowed themselves to push themselves too hard with out care. Who has gotten lost in all the bravado of their very existence and right to live an ordinary life because they have a gift or talent they cannot contain or control for it is a very big part of their being. Sometimes you have to step back away from it all to keep control of it all. To keep from getting lost in it all in order to stay the master in all of it.

The New Hustle: Pets Over People

In a devastating economy, in some places more than others(like Michigan for example) people have got to find ways to keep their heads above water and legally that is. You've got to maintain an honest hustle because the government is watching like never before. You will find people doing some of the well ummmm, craziest and weirdest things to get by. Now I know you all have heard many true stories of spouses and loved ones turning up dead because there was a hefty life insurance policy awaiting the beneficiary right? People marrying with the mentality "Marriage is grande, divorce is 100 grand"? Well did you ever think that a person would buy a pet, insure it and then murder it for the same reasons? Did you ever imagine that the pet would be worth more dead than alive? I betcha didn't, I just couldn't wrap my mind around the story of a Dearborn man having 161 dead dogs and another 112 dogs who were starving to death, eating their own feces in his home. They neighbors could smell the stench two blocks away, yet he was sitting there with it everyday and night with money on his mind. To the point that was all he probably could smell was the unforeseen money. If you've got 263 chihuahuas worth an estimated 30k ea. dead, you've got $7,890,000!(give or take cuz I'm sure there is a limit to how many you can claim at once). Before stumbling upon an MSN money report I didn't know this and I'm almost certain a lot of people didn't. The first thing the police did was take this man to have a mental evaluation. later it was reported that he was going to jail. Hmmm, they must've figured out why this man was committing such a genocidal act.Current practice is to value pets at what they would cost to replace, the way insurers put a price on used cars. So if you see someone with 100 dogs and he's not a kennel breeder or a dog sitter he's a hustler! Hell people are gonna start getting themselves neutered/spayed and have more pets instead of kids and spouses because it seems to me the courts value pets over people. Another conspiracy against the human race? Here's the link to the MSN Money report:
http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com/Insurance/KnowYourRights/whats-fido-worth-almost-nothing.aspx